


Alone with the Coat

by Destielismylove



Category: Supernatural
Genre: After leviathans, Dean in pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-14
Updated: 2014-11-14
Packaged: 2018-02-25 08:15:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2614721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Destielismylove/pseuds/Destielismylove
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for a prompt on facebook: "Dean holding Cas trench after leviathan thingy breaking down into wrecked sobs in an alleyway. Trying to hold on but he just couldn't take the pain anymore and he finally snaps"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Alone with the Coat

**Author's Note:**

> So this was written really fast and at 1 am for a prompt. Hope it lives up to some standards.

Cas was gone. The waterlogged trench coat sat in the back seat of the impala, the water soaking into the upholstery as Dean, Sam and Bobby made their way back to where they were staying. The silence was deafening, no one wanting to say anything that could trigger some memories or a screaming match of what could have been done differently. Dean’s knuckles tightened around the leather steering wheel, the creaking indicating the strength in his hands. Sam looked worriedly at his brother, wanting to say something along the lines of “I’m sorry” but not finding the right way to say it and just deciding to keep his mouth shut instead.

The three men made it to the motel they were currently staying at, and Dean pulled into a parking space close to their rooms. As Sam and Bobby retreated from the car, Dean stayed buckled in and pulled away as soon as the two men were clear.

“That boy is gonna have a hard time after this. You prepared for that Sam?” Bobby asked as he watched the impala drive away.

“I don’t know Bobby. I just hope he doesn't do something drastic tonight.” Sam replied, worry clear in his voice. Both men headed to their respective rooms, getting ready for a long and sleepless night.

Dean’s eyes scanned the roadside attractions, trying to find the best bar he could in the middle of nowhere. A small, dark building with a single neon light on the front promised anonymity and a place where Dean could drown his sorrows and not worry about anyone asking if he was okay. Pulling into the parking lot, he turned the key and shut off the engine, leaning his head back as he sighed and rubbed at his tired eyes. When he opened them again, his eyes landed on the trench coat sitting in the back seat and Dean tore his gaze away as he slammed open the driver side door and practically ran to get into the building and away from the reminder.

Smoke lined the ceiling of the bar, no one looking up as Dean made his way to the back corner and sat on the stool, away from as many people as he could get. The heavyset barman took his time getting over to Dean, the wait agonizing that he ordered a triple finger whisky and downed that as fast as he could before asking for another one, settling in for the long-haul.

Three glasses of whiskey and a few beers later, and Dean was close to drunk and peeling back the label on his latest beer. The bartender had already cut him off, managing to leave a glass of water for Dean if he ever decided he needed it. Throwing down a few bills, Dean made way to leave, walking as much as he could over to the impala.

He managed to make it in and pull away from the bar before his eyes wandered to the backseat again and before he knew it, he was pulling into an alleyway, shuddering breaths wracking his chest as he tried to breath. He let his forehead fall to the steering wheel, closing his eyes as tight as he could to not let the tears leak that he knew were there. He maneuvered his hand over the seat and grabbed at the dry fabric, his fingers clenching in the coat as he pulled it towards him.

Before he knew it, he was small tears fall down onto the trench coat, reminding Dean that he had pulled it out of the river after Cas had gone in and that’s when he felt his chest clench and his throat close as a sob worked its way free. After that, he was gone. Dean cried into the coat, trying to get a hold of what was happening and feeling lost in his own world. He was holding the last part of Cas that he would ever get to hold and it hurt him knowing that he should have done more when he had the chance. The regret of not letting Cas know hurt Dean even more and he clutched the trench coat to his chest, hoping beyond anything that this wouldn't be his last chance.

In the quiet night, Dean’s sob wracked through the alley, echoing off the brickwork and out into the night. As they slowly subsided, Dean sniffled and looked at the coat, now wet from his tears and prayed.

“Castiel. If you’re out there, I won’t ever stop until I find you. And anyone who stands in my way is a dead man. I will find you Cas, and I won’t ever let you go again.”


End file.
